Britney Spears will gain 150 pounds, take to wearing muu muus on stage, and demand to be respected for her talent. Meanwhile, Christina Aguilera sets a record for most body piercing before dying tragically when all the piercings are simultaneously ripped from her body in a tragic giant electro-magnet accident.
Osama bin Laden will be convert to Kabbalah and record a duet with Madonna that will debut at #1 in France.
PETA will boycott Orkin pest control as cockroach mass murderers and call for a U.N. tribunal to try the "Orkin Man" for crimes against bug-manity. (OK, so not all these predictions are unlikely).
Hillary Clinton will decide to take a hard line against all terrorist supporting countries in her new book "It Takes a Nuke".
George Bush will win 47 states in the election after Howard Dean admits he has no idea about foreign policy. OK, Dean won't admit that, but the electorate will realize it and Bush will still win 47 states.
Major League Baseball players will realize their contracts have gotten out of control and are harming the game. The union will threaten to strike if their demand is not met to restructure their contract to limit the money their players can receive - and the Palestinian Authority will condemn suicide bombings.
I will land a job as a columnist for the Wall Street Journal. My witty writings will gain the attention of a high profile producer who will use my articles for a new TV series that will be the most watched premier ever. The contract will make me rich, but after the first 6 episodes the writing will become shoddy and cliche leading to a cancellation after the first season. Reruns will live on and become a cult classic.
Wednesday, December 31, 2003
Back again
I'm back from my vacation.
We had a great time after we got over our sicknesses. After Christmas Honeybun and I went to Phoenix to see my father's wedding. We met family I hadn't seen in 20 years.
I also hadn't been in Phoenix since 1991. I know everything changes, but wow! The neighborhood I grew up in is hardly recognizable. The biggest change I saw with the size of the city. I'm amazed at how much it has grown - while taking for granted the immense growth in the Denver metro area where I live now.
Phoenix is still a great city. I'd live there again if it weren't so damn hot in July and August.
We had a great time after we got over our sicknesses. After Christmas Honeybun and I went to Phoenix to see my father's wedding. We met family I hadn't seen in 20 years.
I also hadn't been in Phoenix since 1991. I know everything changes, but wow! The neighborhood I grew up in is hardly recognizable. The biggest change I saw with the size of the city. I'm amazed at how much it has grown - while taking for granted the immense growth in the Denver metro area where I live now.
Phoenix is still a great city. I'd live there again if it weren't so damn hot in July and August.
Thursday, December 25, 2003
Warm fuzzies
Well it's Christmas day and the rituals are nearly complete. We got up early and unwrapped all our gifts and stocking stuffers (all in our pajamas). My in-laws really know how to bring out the excitement of Christmas. Its contagious.
After the gifts was the traditional (for us) breakfast of egg casserole (with green chili and sausage) and cinnamon rolls. Mmmm...cinnamon rolls.
Now there is nothing left but waiting for the weight gain. Ahhh, I love Christmas.
Honeybun is still nauseous with flu like symptoms, my head is still a snot factory. But its CHRISTMAS!
Merry Christmas everyone.
After the gifts was the traditional (for us) breakfast of egg casserole (with green chili and sausage) and cinnamon rolls. Mmmm...cinnamon rolls.
Now there is nothing left but waiting for the weight gain. Ahhh, I love Christmas.
Honeybun is still nauseous with flu like symptoms, my head is still a snot factory. But its CHRISTMAS!
Merry Christmas everyone.
Wednesday, December 24, 2003
Ya gotta be kidding me
So we're here in warm - 60 something - Las Cruces. The Luminarios are around the in-laws place waiting to be lit at sundown. Christmas eve dinner is being prepared.
And wouldn't you know it, Honeybun and I are both sick. She is feeling like she wants to throw up everything she has eaten in the last 6 months. I'm feeling like my head is one big snot factory...wait a sec (snooooorrrrrt). Ah better for a little while.
It's been a year since I've had a vacation, and I'm sick. Great.
Well at least we are with family. Merry Christmas everyone.
And wouldn't you know it, Honeybun and I are both sick. She is feeling like she wants to throw up everything she has eaten in the last 6 months. I'm feeling like my head is one big snot factory...wait a sec (snooooorrrrrt). Ah better for a little while.
It's been a year since I've had a vacation, and I'm sick. Great.
Well at least we are with family. Merry Christmas everyone.
Saturday, December 20, 2003
Vacation
Well, probably won't blog much for the next two weeks or so. I'm going on vacation with Honeybun to Las Cruces, NM for Christmas. After that, we will head over to Phoenix, AZ to see my father's wedding.
Merry Christmas everyone.
Merry Christmas everyone.
Zero-tolerance = Zero-intelligence
Birmingham, Alabama Clay-Chalkville High sophmore Ysatis Jones has been suspended from school and told she must attend an alternative school for a month for commiting a "major drug offense". She took Motrin for menstrual cramps.
Attending the alternative school would put Jones, an A-B student, in classes with children who committed offenses such as battery, arson and possessing illegal drugs.
Proving once again that people who cannot use critical thinking skills should not be given the responsibility of educating children.
When are parents going to fire the public schools?
Attending the alternative school would put Jones, an A-B student, in classes with children who committed offenses such as battery, arson and possessing illegal drugs.
Proving once again that people who cannot use critical thinking skills should not be given the responsibility of educating children.
When are parents going to fire the public schools?
Should it pay to be stupid?
CNN reports:
ST. PAUL, Minnesota (AP) -- The wife of a hockey fan who crashed his car after drinking too much at a Minnesota Wild game has sued the team, saying her husband shouldn't have been served so much alcohol.
Whoever owns the property he crashed into should sue the wife for allowing her husband to drive.
ST. PAUL, Minnesota (AP) -- The wife of a hockey fan who crashed his car after drinking too much at a Minnesota Wild game has sued the team, saying her husband shouldn't have been served so much alcohol.
Whoever owns the property he crashed into should sue the wife for allowing her husband to drive.
Cynthia Tucker is a moron
In Cynthia Tucker's current column she criticizes conservatives, specifically James Dobson of Focus on the Family for condemning gay marriage but not complaining loudly enough about shows like The Bachelor or The Bachelorette.
She tries to make the case that gay marriage should be approved because James Dobson has not forcefully criticized The Bachelorette.
What she ignores is that Focus on the Family does not approve of shows like The Bachelorette. Boundless.org, a site affiliated with Focus on the Family specifically criticized Married by America - another reality show that tried to introduce couples so they would get married. While I did not find a specific reference from Focus on the Family on The Bachelorette, it wasn't hard to figure what the view of Focus is on these types of shows.
Then she ignores the entire purpose of Focus on the Family - to preserve families. Even a cursory glance at Focus on the Family's website leads one to believe that they support in depth preparation before entering into marriage. Even without a specific condemnation of that particular show, it seems obvious that James Dobson would not approve of making a life time vow merely for the purpose of trying to generate one night of ratings for a TV network.
Her conclusion is wrong. Conservatives are concerned about shows like The Bachelorette. They degrade marriage into a passing entertainment. It sends the message that you can change the channel when the marriage gets old.
Cynthia's case for gay marriage is based on the fact that she doesn't like James Dobson. In the end, that just isn't convincing. The irony is that James Dobson would disapprove of The Bachelorette just as much as she does.
She tries to make the case that gay marriage should be approved because James Dobson has not forcefully criticized The Bachelorette.
What she ignores is that Focus on the Family does not approve of shows like The Bachelorette. Boundless.org, a site affiliated with Focus on the Family specifically criticized Married by America - another reality show that tried to introduce couples so they would get married. While I did not find a specific reference from Focus on the Family on The Bachelorette, it wasn't hard to figure what the view of Focus is on these types of shows.
Then she ignores the entire purpose of Focus on the Family - to preserve families. Even a cursory glance at Focus on the Family's website leads one to believe that they support in depth preparation before entering into marriage. Even without a specific condemnation of that particular show, it seems obvious that James Dobson would not approve of making a life time vow merely for the purpose of trying to generate one night of ratings for a TV network.
Her conclusion is wrong. Conservatives are concerned about shows like The Bachelorette. They degrade marriage into a passing entertainment. It sends the message that you can change the channel when the marriage gets old.
Cynthia's case for gay marriage is based on the fact that she doesn't like James Dobson. In the end, that just isn't convincing. The irony is that James Dobson would disapprove of The Bachelorette just as much as she does.
Wednesday, December 17, 2003
We need school vouchers
It's official, teacher's unions do not care about children. But then, we already knew that. The latest evidence comes from Washington.
When the Seattle Times requested information about teachers and coaches accused of sexual misconduct from Bellevue School district, the school worked with the union to destroy the information.
Sickening really. Now, I'm fully aware that people make false allegations. Too many times, a false allegation alone can ruin lives. In those cases, the school must publicly clear the accused and punish the false accuser. But to be complicit in hiding the guilty is abhorrent. The newspaper obtained an email from Sharon Howard, an attorney for the school district, that said:
"There is no reason we would ever want to drag current or former employees through public attention to such matters - even those who were found to have committed misconduct,"
This is why we need school vouchers so tax payers can afford private schools. When public schools show such complete disregard for children, it is time to take back control of our children's education and safety.
When the Seattle Times requested information about teachers and coaches accused of sexual misconduct from Bellevue School district, the school worked with the union to destroy the information.
Sickening really. Now, I'm fully aware that people make false allegations. Too many times, a false allegation alone can ruin lives. In those cases, the school must publicly clear the accused and punish the false accuser. But to be complicit in hiding the guilty is abhorrent. The newspaper obtained an email from Sharon Howard, an attorney for the school district, that said:
"There is no reason we would ever want to drag current or former employees through public attention to such matters - even those who were found to have committed misconduct,"
This is why we need school vouchers so tax payers can afford private schools. When public schools show such complete disregard for children, it is time to take back control of our children's education and safety.
Tuesday, December 16, 2003
Don't trust the U.N.
After my last post, I had to check into some facts. Over and over, Democrats are crying for the U.N. to take over in Iraq. I don't understand why they would want to deny freedom to Iraq.
The U.N. is NOT an organization that represents freedom or democracy. Of the 191 member nations, only 85 have democratic governments. The 106 others are dictatorships or one-party governments. 48 or complete dictatorships.
The U.N. believes a dictatorship is just as righteous as a democracy. Last year, the United States was voted off the U.N. Human Rights Commission and replaced with terrorist supporting Libya.
The U.N. does not allow Taiwan (a democratic nation of 23 million people) to join. NewsMax.com documents all this.
I find it scary that Democrats have more faith in a totalitarian supporting organization that it does in our own republic. I said the Democrats want to deny freedom to Iraq. What other explanation could there be?
The U.N. is NOT an organization that represents freedom or democracy. Of the 191 member nations, only 85 have democratic governments. The 106 others are dictatorships or one-party governments. 48 or complete dictatorships.
The U.N. believes a dictatorship is just as righteous as a democracy. Last year, the United States was voted off the U.N. Human Rights Commission and replaced with terrorist supporting Libya.
The U.N. does not allow Taiwan (a democratic nation of 23 million people) to join. NewsMax.com documents all this.
I find it scary that Democrats have more faith in a totalitarian supporting organization that it does in our own republic. I said the Democrats want to deny freedom to Iraq. What other explanation could there be?
We got him
Saddam Hussein was capture by U.S. Army forces. Quickly, there was a backlash. Howard Dean claimed that America is not safer? He may as well have claimed the sky is not blue.
U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan said he did not support the death penalty for Hussein. Surely there comes a point when a person's evil justifies taking that person's life. For Kofi Annan, hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of murders (not to mention rapes and tortures) does not rise to that level.
Please God, never let the U.N. become the global government it wants to be.
U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan said he did not support the death penalty for Hussein. Surely there comes a point when a person's evil justifies taking that person's life. For Kofi Annan, hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of murders (not to mention rapes and tortures) does not rise to that level.
Please God, never let the U.N. become the global government it wants to be.
Friday, December 12, 2003
Story time
Paul Harvey told this story a few years ago. Honeybun laughs at me when I try to tell it. I cannot get through it without welling up. Here is an inferior retelling:
Sarah remembers living in an orphanage. During Christmas some groups would come by to give the children gifts. One year, Sarah received a Christmas card that was covered with felt. She opened it up and read the greeting, “God loves you, you are a special person. Merry Christmas from the San Jose Fire Department.”
Sarah kept the card and anytime she felt lonely, she would pull out the card, rub the felt and read the greeting. She read the card so often, the felt rubbed off eventually wore off. But every time she read it, she knew she was special.
Later Sarah was adopted. Her mother took her to the nursing home during Christmas to visit the residents. Each year she would see the residents participate in the activities except for one man who would sit and scowl at the celebration.
She asked her mother why the man didn’t participate. Sarah’s mother didn’t know. The next year Sarah was thinking of the man and remember how the Christmas card made her feel. She got some paper, glue and scissors. She cut some felt and pasted it to the front. Inside she wrote, “God loves you, you are a special person. Merry Christmas, love, Sarah.”
When they went to the nursing home, the man was sitting in his chair. Sarah walked up to him and gave him the card. The man looked at the card, opened it, and read the greeting. Then he looked at Sarah and said “Thank you.” That year instead of sitting alone, he sat Sarah on his lap and sang carols with everyone else. It was the first time Sarah saw him smile.
When they were leaving, Sarah asked her mother what the man did before he retired. Her mother said, “He was a fireman in the San Jose Fire Department.”
Sarah remembers living in an orphanage. During Christmas some groups would come by to give the children gifts. One year, Sarah received a Christmas card that was covered with felt. She opened it up and read the greeting, “God loves you, you are a special person. Merry Christmas from the San Jose Fire Department.”
Sarah kept the card and anytime she felt lonely, she would pull out the card, rub the felt and read the greeting. She read the card so often, the felt rubbed off eventually wore off. But every time she read it, she knew she was special.
Later Sarah was adopted. Her mother took her to the nursing home during Christmas to visit the residents. Each year she would see the residents participate in the activities except for one man who would sit and scowl at the celebration.
She asked her mother why the man didn’t participate. Sarah’s mother didn’t know. The next year Sarah was thinking of the man and remember how the Christmas card made her feel. She got some paper, glue and scissors. She cut some felt and pasted it to the front. Inside she wrote, “God loves you, you are a special person. Merry Christmas, love, Sarah.”
When they went to the nursing home, the man was sitting in his chair. Sarah walked up to him and gave him the card. The man looked at the card, opened it, and read the greeting. Then he looked at Sarah and said “Thank you.” That year instead of sitting alone, he sat Sarah on his lap and sang carols with everyone else. It was the first time Sarah saw him smile.
When they were leaving, Sarah asked her mother what the man did before he retired. Her mother said, “He was a fireman in the San Jose Fire Department.”
Tuesday, December 09, 2003
Like, schools should teach kids to read....er sum junk
The December 8, 2003 issue of People magazine has a story about former NBA star Kevin Johnson. (Side note - my brush with fame was meeting Kevin Johnson right after he was traded to Phoenix when he came into the restaurant I worked in.)
Kevin Johnson was concerned with the failing Sacramento High School in California. People says the high school was "plagued by plummeting test scores, student apathy and a deteriorating campus." Only 20% of students could read at grade level. His solution was to raise $7 million through his foundation St. Hope and convert the campus into a charter school.
Who could be against a philanthropist wanting to spend millions to educate inner city kids? Public educators. Johnson's biggest opponent was The Sacramento City Teachers Association. A major reason was their objection to the school being run by St. Hope - a faith based organization.
Some people claim that religion leads to ignorance. It turns out Secularism led to ignorance at Sacramento High and "educators" would rather see kids condemned to a life without education than see them learn to read and perhaps hear about faith in the process.
Kevin Johnson was concerned with the failing Sacramento High School in California. People says the high school was "plagued by plummeting test scores, student apathy and a deteriorating campus." Only 20% of students could read at grade level. His solution was to raise $7 million through his foundation St. Hope and convert the campus into a charter school.
Who could be against a philanthropist wanting to spend millions to educate inner city kids? Public educators. Johnson's biggest opponent was The Sacramento City Teachers Association. A major reason was their objection to the school being run by St. Hope - a faith based organization.
Some people claim that religion leads to ignorance. It turns out Secularism led to ignorance at Sacramento High and "educators" would rather see kids condemned to a life without education than see them learn to read and perhaps hear about faith in the process.
Monday, December 08, 2003
To proofread or not to proofread
Like a fellow blogger of mine that shall remain nameless (but is linked to from this site), I am lazy. Therefore, I do not proofread with anything that resembles attention-to-detail*.
It has come to my attention that I spelled "especially" wrong in my previous post. As a show of my rebel attitude, I refuse to correct it.
(*This is an example of why resumes cannot be trusted. In the opening paragraph of mine, I claim to have great attention-to-detail as a strength. Honeybun always laughs at that one.)
It has come to my attention that I spelled "especially" wrong in my previous post. As a show of my rebel attitude, I refuse to correct it.
(*This is an example of why resumes cannot be trusted. In the opening paragraph of mine, I claim to have great attention-to-detail as a strength. Honeybun always laughs at that one.)
Saturday, December 06, 2003
Office parties
Tonight I'm going to a party hosted by a co-worker. These things are always touchy. You want to go and enjoy yourself, but you pray no one gets really drunk and does something stupid - espicially yourself. Since I can't drink anymore, I'm not as worried about me doing something idiotic in front of my boss or his wife.
We'll see if anyone else does anything embarrassing. We can only hope :)
UPDATE:
The party went well. No one got slobbering drunk and no teddy bears were subject to being thrown up on. The host did get himself engaged though. Good for him.
We'll see if anyone else does anything embarrassing. We can only hope :)
UPDATE:
The party went well. No one got slobbering drunk and no teddy bears were subject to being thrown up on. The host did get himself engaged though. Good for him.
Friday, December 05, 2003
Why vouchers are needed
Amanda Stiles, a sophmore at Parkway High School in Shreveport, Louisiana, has been expelled for one year for having Advil in her purse. Amanda's purse was searched after another student reported her for smoking at school. The teacher did not find cigarettes or a lighter, but did find the Advil.
The Board Superintendent claimed the school system is following a state law that requires a one-year expulsion and being consistent in the system's "zero-tolerance" policy.
So another group of presumably competent educators has sacrificed good judgement on the altar of zero-tolerance.
The parents say they cannot afford private school. The result of this horribly short-sighted decision is a young girl described as an "average" student is being denied the opportunity to be educated. Considering the poor judgement the board used, she probably isn't any worse off.
The Board Superintendent claimed the school system is following a state law that requires a one-year expulsion and being consistent in the system's "zero-tolerance" policy.
So another group of presumably competent educators has sacrificed good judgement on the altar of zero-tolerance.
The parents say they cannot afford private school. The result of this horribly short-sighted decision is a young girl described as an "average" student is being denied the opportunity to be educated. Considering the poor judgement the board used, she probably isn't any worse off.
Not by, of, or for...
A denver judge has ruled that Colorado's school voucher program is unconstitutional. Poor kids cannot use vouchers to escape shoddy public schools to get a better education.
Judge Meyer wrote, "I see no way to interpret the voucher program statute in a way that does not run afoul of the principle of local control."
The voucher program is designed to allow parents with children in failing schools to attend private schools of their choice. In other words, its for districts that have chosen not to excercise the local control they have.
This is just another example of courts thwarting the will of the people. The suggested constitutional conflict is a thinly veiled attempt to rule by judicial fiat. Again.
Oppenents of the voucher plan claim it will undermine public education by siphoning off students and the tax dollars they bring. This is a bald faced lie. It will actually give more money per student to each district. The money put towards the voucher is less than the money paid to the district to educate the student. The district keeps the difference between what it would have received fo the student to attend the public school and what is put toward the voucher. Sounds great for the students remaining at the school.
But the oppenents aren't really interested in educating students. They would rather keep the status quo where parents have no control over the way their children are indoctrinated.
Judge Meyer wrote, "I see no way to interpret the voucher program statute in a way that does not run afoul of the principle of local control."
The voucher program is designed to allow parents with children in failing schools to attend private schools of their choice. In other words, its for districts that have chosen not to excercise the local control they have.
This is just another example of courts thwarting the will of the people. The suggested constitutional conflict is a thinly veiled attempt to rule by judicial fiat. Again.
Oppenents of the voucher plan claim it will undermine public education by siphoning off students and the tax dollars they bring. This is a bald faced lie. It will actually give more money per student to each district. The money put towards the voucher is less than the money paid to the district to educate the student. The district keeps the difference between what it would have received fo the student to attend the public school and what is put toward the voucher. Sounds great for the students remaining at the school.
But the oppenents aren't really interested in educating students. They would rather keep the status quo where parents have no control over the way their children are indoctrinated.
Thursday, December 04, 2003
Ahh...It's good to be dead
George Harrison, Johhny and June Cash, and Warren Zevon (who was he?) all have something in common. They are all dead and all received multiple Grammy nominations this year.
If your career needs a boost - go ahead and die. Problem is, you can only do it once.
If your career needs a boost - go ahead and die. Problem is, you can only do it once.
Wednesday, December 03, 2003
Really, he was a nice guy
Nathaniel Jones died this past week after fighting with police. The 350+ pound man was high on cocaine and PCP when he fought with police. The video shows Jones advance on a retreating police officer, swing at him, then grab him.
Jones' family is calling for an independent investigation. His grandmother said, "Skipper [Jones] was just a good old, fat jolly fella. He wasn't violent."
Right.
His aunt Diane Payton said, "Everyone he met, that he touched, loved him. He was never mean."
I'm sure the policeman felt that Jones was the nicest guy to every assualt him. Still, I doubt that the policeman he "touched" felt very much love.
The police are in a catch-22. This man made choices that led to his own death and the police are blamed. Because he died while committing, a crime the police are racist. If the police did not respond, people would claim more racism for not protecting the black community.
It would be nice to see some integrity from the activists. Stop defending thugs and criminals as the innocent victims.
The Cincinnati Post believes that the public will receive an honest answer on whether or not the officers reacted appropriately according to their editorial.
The real question is whether or not the activists will accept any other answer than one that condemns the police. I doubt it when people like as Kweisi Mfume already claim the police behavior was "well outside the norm for subduing an unarmed suspect.''
Jones' family is calling for an independent investigation. His grandmother said, "Skipper [Jones] was just a good old, fat jolly fella. He wasn't violent."
Right.
His aunt Diane Payton said, "Everyone he met, that he touched, loved him. He was never mean."
I'm sure the policeman felt that Jones was the nicest guy to every assualt him. Still, I doubt that the policeman he "touched" felt very much love.
The police are in a catch-22. This man made choices that led to his own death and the police are blamed. Because he died while committing, a crime the police are racist. If the police did not respond, people would claim more racism for not protecting the black community.
It would be nice to see some integrity from the activists. Stop defending thugs and criminals as the innocent victims.
The Cincinnati Post believes that the public will receive an honest answer on whether or not the officers reacted appropriately according to their editorial.
The real question is whether or not the activists will accept any other answer than one that condemns the police. I doubt it when people like as Kweisi Mfume already claim the police behavior was "well outside the norm for subduing an unarmed suspect.''
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